


With You I'm Home

by Darkenedrosepetals



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Eventual Romance, Eventual relationship, F/M, Friendship, Set after 7X02, Slow Burn, growing relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-04-25 17:03:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14383092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkenedrosepetals/pseuds/Darkenedrosepetals
Summary: In a world where the dead roamed and the living fought to exist, Ezekiel realizes that his kingdom isn't his only growing passion. From the very moment Ezekiel laid eyes on Carol, something sparked deep within him in a way he didn't quite understand.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello There! 
> 
> I had the idea of this fiction, after realizing that I am totally into the pairing of Ezekiel/Carol. The timeline of this fiction is during the period when Carol is at her cottage during season 7. Of course, this may change down the line. I apologize in advance for any mistakes. Thank you for stopping by.

Disclaimer: I do not own TWD.

 

The cottage. A humble abode. A place where she could be herself and not the person everyone wanted to her to be. A place Carol chose for herself.

Not pretending to be a little mouse, to gain people’s trust. Not giving into the bloodlust that hummed in her veins when she thought of the injustice done to her loved ones. Or crumbling to the sorrow that squeezed at her throat when dark thoughts echoed in the corners of her mind.

_Ouch_

The sting of a small cut on her hand from a lemon she was slicing pulled her from her trance. Her plan was to make fresh lemonade. Something tart, tangy and sweet for her to drink with her simple lunch of fruit and baked bread. Suddenly she wished for ice cubes to chill her drink. A treat in the world they lived in now. Something she never took for granted in the Georgia heat in the world before.

A life time ago it seemed.

Carol sighed to herself and squeezed lemon juice into the water-filled pitcher. Afterwards she then added the sugar and stirred. She added a bit more lemon, after tasting the mixture. She was never a fan of overly sweet lemonade.

Just as she was slicing into the cucumbers, she heard a quiet knock. At first, she thought she was imagining it. No one knocked nowadays. It was either the bang of the dead or the barging in of the living. Either way, she gripped the knife in her hand and tipped to the front door.

To her minor relief, it wasn’t a walker or else it would have kept banging at her nearness. Still she gripped her weapon and grabbed the doorknob and snatched the door open.

There stood no one other than King Ezekiel.

Carol shifted her weight onto her heel and leaned on the door frame. “What are you doing here?”

The first time Ezekiel paid her a visit, he came bearing a freshly picked pomegranate. At the time, it brought a smile to her face. Seeing Ezekiel out of his royal garb both literally and figuratively, offering the very thing she came for the night of her departure.

This time there was an almost apologetic grin on the Kingdom leader’s face. But there was a certain twinkle in his eyes that said he didn’t regret appearing on her doorstep. Yet again.

 “Carol.” Ezekiel drawled. Under his arm was a basket full of fresh produce, and other goods from the kingdom. He glanced down at his offering and back to her expectantly.

Carol moved aside to allow him entry. She shut and locked the door behind him and joined him in the kitchen. She resumed her position at the counter to finish preparing her lunch. In the corner of her eye, she could see Ezekiel arranging the basket next to the one already on the table. She turned her head in time to see him taking something out that was covered with a cloth.

“I assumed you’d be having lunch,” Ezekiel said as an explanation as he removed the cloth. “Michelle made fresh cheese.”

“Sounds good,” Carol answered, as she grabbed an apple and began slicing it. She could feel his eyes on her back as she worked. “How is everyone?”

“They’re all well,” Ezekiel came to stand next to her.  “They send their greetings.”

Carol nodded. Small talk was never her true forte unless she resumed her charade of ‘sweet and innocent’. She faltered for a second when she felt Ezekiel’s sudden warmth through her thin demin button up. She cleared her throat. “Would you like a plate? I have baked bread that Benjamin delivered two days ago. It would go well with the cheese.”

“All right,” Ezekiel agreed as he placed the cheese in her outstretched hand.

Carol used a separate knife to slice the cheese. She wouldn’t say it out loud, but she was excited to have something other than just fruit and bread.  She promptly fixed the two plates and poured up the lemonade into two mugs.

The two of them ate in mostly silence. It allowed her to analyze the flavor of the cheese. It had been a while since she had real cheese. Cheese that wasn't in powder form from a scavenged macaroni dinner.  
The cheese had a delicate flavor, one that complimented the baked bread and even the crisp cucumber she paired it with.   
  
"The cheese is delicious," Carol complimented. 

Ezekiel hummed in agreement. “So is the lemonade.” He lifted the mug to his lips, keeping his eyes on the woman before him. “Tart with a perfect amount of sweetness.”

_Smooth. Real smooth._

Carol pushed from the table, taking their empty plates, and returning with the pitcher of lemonade. She refilled their mugs before reclaiming her seat.

Carol crossed her arms over her chest. “Besides the care package. Why are you really here Ezekiel?” She could tell that something was on his mind other than ‘checking’ on her.

Ezekiel sobered, his earlier bravado gone. “At times it tires me to be King Ezekiel. When I am with you I can just be Ezekiel.”

Carol knew from their conversation in the royal garden that his royal charade was for the benefit of his people. But hearing it now, in the light of day, outside the walls of the kingdom was different.

Carol snorted. “Sounds like you need more alone time.”

“It is why I am here with you,” Ezekiel shrugged. “This is my alone time.”

"I am not the greatest of company Ezekiel," Carol tried. The man had an entire 'kingdom'. Surely there was someone there to talk to. Not that she didn't secretly like his company.  
  
Ezekiel searched her face, seeming to ponder what to say. He removed his gloves and began to massage the skin under his knuckles. "Were you this reserved in the world before? Or in even Alexandria?"  
  
Carol stretched out her legs under the table, mindful of Ezekiel's legs and lifted her mug to her lips. She didn’t particularly like talking about her life before the world ended. Thinking of that version of herself always left a bad taste in her mouth.

Thoughts of her actions in the early days of Alexandria made her wince. Pretending to fit in, plastering a smile on her face while playing Martha Stewart was an exhausting experience. She refused to do it again here in the kingdom.

 “I’ve learned to adapt and survive,” Carol answered finally.

Ezekiel nodded as he flexed his fingers. He seemed to be satisfied enough with her answer. “Not everyone is able to do that in this world, even before the wasted roamed.”

“It hasn’t been easy,” Carol admitted quietly. She spoke of the weight that she carried when she was alone. When the faces of her loved ones and those she killed flashed in her eyes. She couldn’t do it anymore. She couldn’t kill for those that she loved. Each time chipped away at her already tattered soul.

_I can’t anymore_

Ezekiel covered her hand with his own. The warmth of his touch, pulled her from her inner musings. Carol slowly met his eyes, finding that his brows were knitted with concern. In a tone that was just above a whisper he said. “You are strong. Never forget that.”


	2. Chapter 2

Ezekiel dropped unceremoniously on the sofa by the fire after a long day of doing odd jobs around the kingdom. It wasn’t beneath him to help his people. It helped keep his mind occupied. Especially with his secret treaty with the Saviors,

Slowly as his tense body relaxed into the plush cushions, he closed his eyes and allowed his mind to drift to thoughts of Carol. Particularly that night in the garden and the events of the day afterward.

_Ezekiel pinned her with his stare. “The guns you brought here in your pack. They belong to the Saviors.”_

_Carol blinked. “What do you know about the Saviors?”_

_“More than I care to, unfortunately. They nearly extinguished you.” The thought of her demise disturbed him._

_“But you did more than put up a fight Carol – you won,” Ezekiel said as he closed some of the space between them. He didn’t miss the way she back stepped as he neared._

_Carol chuckled. “By ending up here?”_

_“That’s funny to you?”_

_Carol eased onto the cushioned sofa with a sigh. “You’re a joke. This place is. That’s what you do with jokes. You laugh.” She situated her hands on her lap. “Out there, it’s real. I’ve been to places where I thought I could just be.”_

_Ezekiel chuckled inwardly at her tone. There’s the real Carol._

_“You’re selling these people a fairy tale.” Carol spat._

_“Maybe they need the fairy tale. Maybe the contradiction is the point.”_

_“And ruling over people and you having your ass kissed by everyone’s just a perk?” Carol deadpanned._

_Ezekiel should have been insulted by her words. But in all honesty, it had been a while since someone spoke to him in such a forward manner. Other than the occasional encounter with Gavin and his crew. He would never admit aloud, but it was refreshing compared to the daily meek interactions with his people._

_Ezekiel came to stand in front of her. For a moment he watched as the firelight dance against her pale skin. The way she regarded him with her steely stare and raised brows. He gestured to the empty space beside her. “May I?”_

_Carol shrugged._

_Ezekiel lowered himself to the seat beside her. For the first time in a while, he began to let the carefully woven royal charade fade for a second. He allowed his true self to come to the forefront. He peered at Carol, choosing his words wisely. “People want someone to follow. It’s human nature.”_

_Carol held his stare but remained silent._

_“They want someone to make ‘em feel safe.” Ezekiel continued. “And people who feel safe are less dangerous… more productive. They see a dude with a tiger, shoot…they start tellin’ stories about finding it in the wild, wrestling it into submission, turning it into his pet. They make the guy larger than life, a hero.” He paused, his eyes glanced down to her lips. “And who am I to burst their bubble?”_

_Carol’s expression had softened, her lips drawn slightly._

_“Next thing you know, they treat me like royalty. They needed someone to follow, so I acted the part. I faked it till I made it.”_

Carol was the mystery that Ezekiel wanted to solve. Her ability to pretend and manipulate was uncanny. The cold demeanor she cloaked around herself as protection from outsiders was unsettling.

_“I just embraced the contradiction. Maybe you could, too, in your own way.” Ezekiel said. “Like, maybe you could go… and not go.”_

_Carol frowned._

_“Yeah, I sound like a crazy person. I get it. You know, maybe I am. But I think I can help…if you let me.”_

_“Why do you care?” Carol demanded._

_“Cause it makes me feel good,” Ezekiel admitted. It was a truth that was both warm and alarming. “I’ll get your stuff together, find somebody I trust to meet you at the gate, so you can go and not go.”_

The slight desperation in his tone in his plea for her to not leave, was evident to his own ears, even if it wasn’t to Carol. He wanted her to stay within the secure walls of the kingdom. There was a fierce need to protect her from the world of the outside.

It was why he packed her bag with more supplies than she initially packed for herself, and asked Morgan to accompany her at the gate. In a situation that he didn’t fully agree with, it was the best compromise that he could come up with. It only made sense that Morgan be the one to go with her. Even if he wanted to be the one to go.

Later that evening when he was tucked away in his bed he pondered the evening’s events. It bothered him that she wanted to leave so fiercely. In the back of his mind, a small voice said it was because of _him_ that she wanted to get away. Not just the kingdom but _him._ He ignored the voice, chalking it up to the emotional rollercoaster he’d been on that day. Dealing with the daily woes of his people and then letting his own walls down with someone who was practically a stranger was draining.

Carol interested him. She called to the innermost depth of his being. It was a tantalizing feeling. One that had him shedding his usual attire of an extra top shirt, and coat that morning and forgoing his staff to walk with Shiva.  He stopped briefly in the garden to pick a fresh pomegranate.

Morgan had already returned and was sitting quietly by himself in the courtyard. Ezekiel nodded to the solemn man, knowing that he’d completed the task entrusted to him.

Ezekiel nodded to Jerry who was on guard with the other men and exited through the gate. There was no need for words, as they knew from routine that their King was only going for a walk and would return.

The morning was quiet with the only immediate sounds coming from the ‘clink’ of Shiva’s chain and his rhythmic footfalls. He was relieved not to hear the telltale sounds of the wasted stumbling in their direction. He wouldn’t hold his breath as knew it wasn’t going to last for long.

Ezekiel kept walking until he was on the outskirts of the kingdom. Shiva turned her attention when a vulture landed on the street to feast on one of the corpses along the road. It was a fresh kill most likely put out its misery by Morgan.

The old cottage finally came into view. He stopped outside the gate, with Shiva close at his side. She looked up expectantly but remained silent only twitching her ears. The beast could sense his growing apprehension and if she could talk she would probably ask. ‘Aren’t we going in?’

Ezekiel left out a slow sigh and unhatched the gate, allowing them entry. He was careful to secure it back before strolling to the front door. Shiva took it upon herself to be a natural doorbell along with his quiet knock. He grinned.  If Carol was asleep, she would certainly be awake now. He could hear movement and then the door opening with Carol gazing at him as to say _‘What?’_

_“You really got to try one of these.”_ Ezekiel held up the pomegranate. In a way, it was his opportunity to reintroduce himself, given that they had gotten off on the wrong foot in the auditorium. He was relieved when she smirked. The little smile met her blue eyes, ones he found that he could easily drown in.

“You know they’re more trouble than they are worth,” Carol was still wearing that smirk.

Ezekiel answered her smile with his own. “I’ll even crack it open for you. Trust me it’s worth it.”

Carol stepped aside and allowed them inside. Ezekiel took in the simple décor, the fresh produce on the table and crackling flames in the fireplace and the earthy scent that lingered in the small space. The setting was oddly inviting. Shiva bumped her head against his hip and plopped down on the floor.  As if to say, ‘I’ll just make myself at home.’

On cue, Ezekiel produced a knife from his pocket.  “Shall we?”

Carol offered a shrug.

\----

There was something strangely satisfying about the small sweet juicy seeds that offered a slight ‘crunch’. The beautiful red juice that was the color of red wine made Carol careful not to squeeze the seeds when popping them into her mouth. Even if she wasn’t trying to make a fashion statement, she didn’t want any red stain on her clothes. It was hard enough getting walker blood out.

Out of habit, she licked the juice from her fingers, and a satisfied moan escaped her lips. She opened her eyes to find Ezekiel gazing at her with an intensity that was different from the night before. It made her aware that they were alone and sitting _too_ close on the lone sofa topped with pillows.

Carol was by no means blind. She noticed from the very moment Morgan wheeled her into the auditorium that Ezekiel was handsome. She hadn’t dwelled on the fact at the time but with each encounter with the flamboyant man, she realized just how attractive he really was. He had the richest brown eyes she’d ever seen and an infectious smile. Then there was his salt and peppered beard and dreadlocks, and his confident stride when he walked. Not to mention his deep voice.

The man obviously kept in shape. She could tell from his exposed forearms and the peak of the skin of his neck through his top that he housed a strong body under those loose fitted clothes.

_‘You park some chocolate in front of me and watch it go bye-bye’_

Carol scoffed inwardly. Why the hell did she have to say that?

“You know, these aren’t so bad after all,” Carol said, hoping that she wasn’t blushing.

Ezekiel grinned. “See? I told you.”

Carol kept from looking at his full lips that were lightly tinted from the juice of the pomegranate seeds. They were certainly kissable that was for sure. She abruptly pushed to her feet to put distance between them. She found it was beginning to feel stifling in the room. Whether it was from the fireplace or her own internal flame she didn’t know.

Shiva, who was quiet until that point, growled.  Carol peered at the feral cat, still unnerved that the beast had the mannerisms of a house cat. It was all too much.

“Thanks for the fruit…but I think you should go.” It was better that she send him away. The sudden urge to peel off his shirt was too tempting.

Confusion was evident on Ezekiel’s face.  “Carol?”

Carol exhaled slowly. She turned around, hoping that her face didn’t betray what she was feeling. “Please?”

Ezekiel rouse from his spot, tugging at Shiva’s chain. The large cat stood at attention, twitching her ears. He headed for the door, stopping briefly to gaze at her. His eyes seemed to search hers for the reason of her sudden change of heart. But he remained silent and exited with Shiva trailing close behind.

Carol let out the breath she was unknowingly holding and went to the window. She watched as Ezekiel carefully secured the gate and walked slowly back the way him came. She pinched the bridge of her nose and groaned.  What had gotten into her? The man was just being friendly. Besides, it wasn’t possible that he would want anything more than friendship with her. He could have his pick of any of the other women in the kingdom.

Carol shook her head. She wasn’t even his friend. No matter what he said in the auditorium. Just another subject in his kingdom. It was his duty to care about her to that extent. Nothing else. She wouldn’t fool herself into thinking that it was anything more.

 “Get it together,” Carol hissed to herself. This was why wanted to live outside the walls of the kingdom. She was vulnerable and confused about what she really wanted right now. No one deserved her short temper or her coldness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Woo. Now, I know the events from ‘The Well’ could have been interpreted in a different way. But I wanted to show the ‘I don’t know what I feel’ that is being shown by Carol. I also want to show that Ezekiel’s presence throws her off, given of what she knows of him and what he has personally told her about himself. Given that Carol has been through so much, it would only be natural for her not to immediately trust someone like Ezekiel. 
> 
> I do hope I didn’t make either of them to be out of character. Nor confuse anyone with the change in POV. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Ezekiel was not looking forward to the impending trade-off with the Saviors. Each time left a sour taste in his mouth. Keeping this secret from his people wasn't something he took pleasure in. He wondered how long it would be before someone noticed that a certain amount of food wasn't accounted for in the kingdom? When would people start asking questions that needed to remain unanswered?

Ezekiel's grip on his cane tightened. There in the deserted area, he and his men waited. Armed for the worst despite the "peace" between them and the Saviors. 

In the truck there was a fresh supply of produce. Crates of tomatoes, squash, and cucumbers. Pounds of strawberries, and even cantaloupes. They were indeed ripe, as the sweet aroma teased his senses. He sighed. A portion his people would never get to eat. Better this than unnecessary bloodshed.   


Ezekiel wasn't against sharing. Quite the opposite. But he knew it wasn't fair to his people who worked hard to keep the kingdom thriving. 

Didn't the same apply to Carol?

 Technically Carol lived on the outskirts. And yet he bought her fresh goods. She didn't require it, but he insisted. It would be some time before her garden flourished, and forging wasn't always substantial. He wouldn't let her perish.

No one questioned Ezekiel's actions. He wondered when that would end? He knew there were ones that were privy to their secret trade and did not agree. They did it to protect their families and those they came to care about as well. 

"They're here your Majesty." Jerry announced. The large man shifted on his feet, girding up for the trade.

Gavin exited the old ford along with his men. He wasn’t in a hurry to cross the space between them. He wanted to draw out time and the unwanted interlude between them. He fixed his collar, dusted off the front his jeans and even smoothed his hair. He made eyes at Diane as he approached.

"Well hello there," Gavin purposely allowed his eyes to roam her form. "What do we have here?"

Ezekiel cleared his throat. "Your produce as you requested." He kept his tone neutral, despite the disgust churning in his gut. He stepped to the side to reveal the crates.

Gavin grinned and reached for one of the cantaloupes. He held it up to his nose and inhaled. "My, my that smells so good. I bet she tastes good too." He directed his last statement toward Diane. 

Richard stepped forward. "Are you ready for us to load your truck up?" There was snark in his tone. 

Gavin's brows dropped as he narrowed his eyes and pursed his lip. He put the cantaloupe back in the crate. "Ezekiel. What have I told you about your man's mouth?"

Ezekiel gritted his teeth and glared at Richard. With a measure of control, he answered. "That is enough Richard."

"You would do best to obey your king," Jared sneered, poking a finger into Richard's chest.

"Shut up Jared," Gavin ordered. He then pointed to Jerry. "You and the others load up our truck.

Jerry and the other men were quick to load the crates into the Savior's truck. In a matter of minutes, the task was complete, and they returned to Ezekiel's side.

"You know the drill, Ezekiel. We'll see you next week. You have the list. No more and no less you hear?" Gavin reminded him. 

Ezekiel nodded. "I shall see that your needs are met." 

Gavin seemed satisfied with his answers and signaled for his crew to leave. They all climbed into the pickup, and with a delayed roar of the engine, they drove away.

Ezekiel let out the breath he didn't remember holding. He turned to Richard who still glared at vacated space of the Saviors. "Do not antagonize them, Richard. They have kept up their end of the truce."

"Yeah for now. What do we do when we can't produce enough? When it gets colder and we need to preserve what we have for our own people? Then what?" Richard spat angrily. 

"Dude, don't raise your voice to the king," Jerry warned.

Ezekiel held up his hand. "Let us leave this place. We have dwelled in the open long enough." He made his point by sliding into the cab of the truck. 

Richard slid into the seat that was to Ezekiel's left and Ralph took the seat to his right. Diane was behind the wheel with Jerry on the passenger side. The engine roared to life on the first try and they were off.

The closer they neared the kingdom the more Richard's words echoed in Ezekiel’s mind. The man was right. The harvest was plentiful. But soon the weather would change and so would the crops available to grow. They would have to ration more than in the present.

Ezekiel sighed. This too shall pass

XXXX

Carol found that the old woman who previously owned the cottage had a certain love for books. Specifically, romance novels, and murder mysteries. She chose one off the shelf, a romance novel based in the older days and curled up on the sofa.

 It reminded her of the days before the world ended. After cleaning the house and cooking, she would tuck away and lose herself in the storylines of a romance novel. She would at times imagine she was the one being desired by the handsome man. The one that would, in the end, confess his burning love for her. It was cheesy and unrealistic but she still yearned for it. Yearned to be loved unconditionally.

Yes, there were those that cared about her. Namely, her adopted family back in Alexandria. Knew that they had her back. It was more than she could ever ask for. But what she wanted was different. Even before the world ended, she wanted to have a man in her life that she loved. Who respected her and didn't believe that she was property. Who loved her for who she was and not what she could give or do for him. Carol had given up on ever experiencing that. Especially now with the way the world was.

Yes, she hooked up with Tobin. 'Lived' with him in a house. And for a little while, she felt normal. Yet it wasn't enough. He wasn't enough. She didn’t love Tobin. Not like he deserved. 

Carol closed the book in her lap with a huff. This was why she kept busy. Listening to her own pitiful monologue was depressing. She left the sofa and grabbed her weapons. It was early enough to go out and return before nightfall. She needed the fresh air and to stretch her legs. She couldn't be a hermit forever.

Carol holstered her gun at her hip and opened her door. There at the gate stood Ezekiel with wide eyes. She closed the door behind her, securing it with a spare key she found days ago and crossed the yard.

"I do believe you have a sixth sense." Ezekiel chuckled. "How did you know I was here? I was quiet."

"I didn't." Carol secured the gate and faced Ezekiel. "I was actually going for a walk."

Ezekiel brows rouse. "Oh?"

Carol noticed that he wasn't wearing his usual assemble nor did he carry his cane. Just a pistol at his hip and probably a spare knife sheathed in his boot. "Got tired of being cooped up.”

"I know the feeling."

Carol snickered. "Sitting on your throne all day is tiring huh?" She knew he did no such thing but couldn't resist teasing him.

Ezekiel didn't miss a beat. "It is quite taxing."

Carol rolled her eyes. "I bet."

"Mind if I join you?"

Carol shrugged. She had no specific direction in which she was heading. "Sure."

Ezekiel seemed relieved that she hadn't denied his request. He silently fell into step with her, letting her take the lead.

It was unnaturally quiet outside. Save for the occasional bird chirp. Carol was so used to hearing the groaning of the dead that the silence was almost uncomfortable. Regardless, she kept her eyes peeled and her ears tuned for any sudden movement. She was certain Ezekiel did the same beside her. She was glad to know that living inside the kingdom walls hadn't dulled his senses. 

Ezekiel hadn't uttered a word since they started walking. He appeared to be there mostly in body more than mind. His jaw was set, an action she associated when one was trying to find a solution to a problem. She wouldn't press the issue, knowing whatever it was about didn't concern her.

Although almost as if Ezekiel had been listening to her thoughts he said. "I have a lot on my plate right now. A lot to consider concerning the saviors."

Carol stopped upon hearing the name. "What about them?"

Ezekiel drew closer to her, keeping his voice lowing knowing they were out in the open. “I...offer part of the kingdom’s food and supplies to them on a weekly basis. Secretly.”

“What do you consider a part?” Carol crossed her arms.

“A portion. Not quite half but a rotation of sorts,” Ezekiel explained slowly. “This week it was fresh produce.”

Carol studied Ezekiel’s rigid posture, his drawn lips, and furrowed brow. It was almost a repeat of what she witnessed with Rick when he spoke of their own deal with the Saviors. She didn’t like the idea then, given that they were barely getting by back then and she sure didn’t like the idea now. People like the Saviors were the scum of the earth. “That isn’t fair to the Kingdom Ezekiel.”

“I know.” Ezekiel huffed.

“It doesn’t even sound right,” Carol scoffed. “The king pays taxes to another ‘king’ to keep his people safe. And if he doesn’t pay, his people will be terrorized and then murdered.”

Ezekiel winced. “You sound like Richard.”

Carol narrowed her eyes, ignoring his comment. “It’s hard enough to come by basic necessities and to have it taken away?” It isn’t right and no damn way to live.”

Ezekiel braced his hand against a tree and tilted his head downward. This action put him directly in front of Carol, partly caging her in.  “I have this conversation in my head every time I ride out to meet them.”

“Then why be content with superficial peace and pretend that everything is alright?” Carol demanded softly. “You can’t fake it till you make it with the Saviors.”

Ezekiel stilled at her words. He pinned her with a stare that sent shivers down her spine. He made a fist, rapping lightly against the tree bark. He closed his eyes and released a slow breath. “I would do whatever it takes to keep my people safe.”

Carol could hear the promise in Ezekiel’s voice.  His normally bright demeanor was darkened, and for the first time since meeting him in the auditorium, she was truly seeing Ezekiel. No deception, no carefully woven metaphors. Just a man, passionate about those he cared about.

"When you lay your head down at night, are you satisfied with the choices you've made?" Carol asked. It was what she asked herself each night.

Ezekiel remained silent.

Carol studied the man before her, searching his eyes where his true feelings reflected. She understood the emotions that swirled there in their depth. She was sure it was in her own eyes as well. "You're afraid."

Ezekiel flinched, proving to Carol that she hit the nail on the head. He exhaled slowly. “And if I say that I am afraid?”

Carol suddenly wanted to cradle his face, but she kept her hands at her sides. “I would say that you’re human, and despite the kingly act you play for the people you’re not immune to fear.”

“I am afraid of losing people,” Ezekiel confessed.

Carol bit her lip. Wasn’t that why she left Alexandria? Why she insisted on isolating herself?

Carol quickly turned away from Ezekiel. Although, she wasn’t paying attention to where she was stepping and tripped over one of the raised roots of the tree.

Ezekiel reacted by pulling her against smack against him, taking the brunt of the fall. Carol landed on top of him, her cheek colliding with his chest.

Carol cursed her clumsiness. “Are you okay?”  

Ezekiel groaned. “Yeah. Are you?”

“I’ll live,” Carol winced at the pain blossoming in her cheek. She frowned when she felt Ezekiel shaking under her. For a moment she thought he was coughing when she realized he was actually laughing. “What’s so funny?”

“If you wanted me on my back all you had to do was ask,” Ezekiel’s head fell back into the pile of dried leaves. After a moment he quieted down and touched the middle of his chest. “You’ve got a hard head.”

Carol was too stunned by his earlier comment to retort. Her mind chose to fixate on the fact that his hand was resting low on her back right above her rear, and her thigh was between his legs.

Ezekiel...”  Carol began but fell silent. There was a faint prickle against her skin. She held her breath as the prickle ascended higher. She made eye contact with Ezekiel, swallowing back the scream that was bubbling in her throat. “T-There’s something crawling under my shirt. I think it’s a spider.” It was embarrassing but the critter was in a place that it was awkward for her to reach given her current position on the ground.

“Which side?” Ezekiel asked.

“The right,” Carol gritted her teeth. She really, really hated spiders. She shifted feeling the hairy prickle travel higher.

“Be still,” Ezekiel commanded. “If it is a spider, I don’t want it to bite you. Could be poisonous.”

If Carol wasn’t terrified she would have thwacked him on the shoulder. “So what, I let it slowly crawl on me until it gets bored?”

“No…I’ll pull it out for you,” Ezekiel said slowly. “That is if you want me to.”

“Yes!” Carol hissed.

Ezekiel exhaled, appearing more nervous about the situation than she was. “Tell me where.”

 Carol instructed him and did her best to stay still, but the higher his fingers inched, the more she squirmed. This was not how she pictured her afternoon stroll. “Right there.” She gasped when his fingers brushed the curve of her spine.

“Got it,” Ezekiel whispered. He removed his hand from under her shirt. He made a fist, killing the insect in his gloved hand.

Carol wasted no time standing to her feet. She dusted herself off, feeling like a complete idiot. She knew her way around weapons, stabbed walkers in the head for crying out loud, but here she was whimpering over a spider? Unbelievable. “Thank you.”

“My pleasure,” Ezekiel was grinning now, the troubled look from earlier gone. He was also on his feet, dusting himself off.

Carol worked her jaw, wincing. Her cheek was beginning to swell. “We should go back. It’ll be getting dark soon.”

“After you.”

XXXX

Carol shook her head and marched forward. She wasn’t interested in talking about what just happened. Not when her blood was still humming in her veins. She would need the entire walk back to the cottage to forget the memory of his fingers on her skin and how good it felt to be pressed against him.

Oh what she wouldn't give for a cold shower right now.

Ezekiel had remained silent but was amused by the situation and its entirety. He was glad that Carol walked a few paces in front of him. His mind insisted on revisiting the events of the last half hour. Especially the brief yet torturous moments with Carol laying on top of him. In the aftermath of their fall, his hand rested dangerously low on her back and her thigh on his crotch.

Ezekiel had commanded for her to be still for her safety and his own dignity to remain intact. Her squirming against him sent blood rushing south. Not to mention feeling her smooth skin under his fingertips.

The removal of the spider had forced a sigh from Carol lips and slight arch of her back. He hadn't focused on it at the time, instead, he was intent on crushing the critter. Which now that he thought about it was pretty big given the spot he wiped from his glove. He truly hoped it didn't bite her. It would be a cruel twist of fate to survive against the dead, only to die by the bite of a spider.

"Hey," Ezekiel called to her. "Are you're alright?"  
  
"Nothing that a painkiller won't fix." Carol snapped. She paused shortly after her response. She touched her cheek sighing. "I'm...sorry I'm just-," she waved her hand. "A bundle of emotions today."

"It's alright," Ezekiel dismissed her apology. He hadn't missed the sadness on her face when she opened the door of the cottage. He could hear it in her voice when they were deeper in the woods. It was becoming easier to read Carol he realized. "It is just one of those days."

Carol had stopped walking. She held a finger to her lips and reached for her knife. He stopped close at her side with his eyes trained ahead. A few yards away there were three of the wasted feeding on a deer. They were too busy tearing into the flesh to notice their presence. He knew that wouldn't last long

The sight was sickening, and enough to make a lesser man vomit where he stood. He swallowed slowly and waited for Carol to react. He wouldn't strike first, knowing that if they were uncoordinated it could end badly.

Carol turned to whisper directly in his ear. "When we get closer, I'll take the walker closet to the head and you take the walker on the end. We'll leave the one missing its arm for last."

Ezekiel nodded. He removed his knife from his boot, choosing to save his bullets and not attract more of wasted to their location.

They crept forward until the corpse at the deer’s rear caught sight of them. It stumbled clumsy to its feet, alerting the others of their approach. Ezekiel gripped the hilt of his knife and waited before lunging forward. The corpse reached for him with bloody hands, but he easily avoided them. He stepped behind the creature and buried his blade into its skull. He snatched back his knife and moved out of the way of the falling corpse.

The other two corpses stumbled their direction. Carol went forward without hesitation, careful to avoid the grabbing hands of the corpse she claimed and stabbed it in the head. She pushed the corpse backward at the same time of pulling back her blade.

As planned one-armed was left, staggering along unbalanced. The angle made it easier for Carol to thrust her blade into the side of its skull. Afterward, she removed her blade, leaving the corpse to drop to the ground in a heap.

Carol’s eyes were focused, her breath still labored from the brief brawl. She crouched and wiped her blade clean on the pants of one of the corpses and replaced it at her hip.

Ezekiel watched her movements, the second nature of them. She dispatched the creatures as they were mere flies being swatted with a rolled newspaper. Anyone else would have suggested they run the opposite direction or screamed in horror.

Ezekiel chuckled to himself. Carol was indeed a force to be reckoned with.

 


	4. Chapter 4

_A few days later…_

Carol could hear noise coming from the opposite direction. It was faint but moving fast enough that she knew it couldn't have been walkers. She scanned the area for a place to hide, but decided against the notion as it would alert whomever was heading in her direction. So, she swallowed down the fear and prepared herself to confront whatever was coming. As the snapping of branches, and crunching of fallen leaves became louder, she readied and lifted her weapon.

Relief and irritation washed over Carol when Benjamin appeared with his own gun pointed.  “Sorry I- Sorry. I thought you were one of the dead.”

Carol lowered her shotgun. “Why didn’t you just run the other way?”

“Well I’m- I’m training. I’m pushing myself, trying to step up.” Benjamin explained.

Carol resisted a snort. “Let me give you some advice. It's gonna be dark soon. Don't wander around out here on your own. You'll get yourself killed.”

“Same goes for you, too, right?”

Carol glared at him. “You’re not me. Go home, Benjamin.”

“Well, I-”

“ _What?_ ” Carol snapped.

“Ezekiel's gonna keep coming out here to check on you. He doesn't want to bug you, but he needs to know that you're okay.” Benjamin told her.

Carol blinked but kept her face schooled. “He told you that?”

“No. But I know him.”

Carol scoffed. She was bothered by the fact that Benjamin could even see the king's obsessive worry for her. "Well, tell him-"

"I can't. He looks out for the people that he cares about." Benjamin admitted.

 Carol didn't have a response for that. She figured the king cared about her because it was his 'duty'. But hearing it from the teenager's mouth stunned her.

“Do you want some food? A bottle of water?” Benjamin offered. “I carry extra in case I run into someone who needs it.”

“Why?”

“There's not a lot of us left. Have to help each other.” Benjamin said simply. He shouldered on his pack. "Maybe I'll see you again?"

"Maybe." Carol repeated and then added. "Heel-toe, heel-toe out here. Bend at your knees. You want to keep quiet. I heard you from a mile away."

"Okay."

Carol watched as the teen disappeared into the woods. She was inwardly pleased to see that he was already putting her advice to action. She remained long after, just standing and listening to the sounds of the woods and the echoing of her thoughts.

‘ _He needs to know that you're okay.’_

Ezekiel kept his distance, though sent others in his place to check on her well-being. It was both touching and downright annoying. Touching, because some else who wasn’t her adopted family cared. Annoying, because all she wanted was solitude. A word that didn’t exist in the “King’s” vocabulary.

Carol shook her head and began the trip back to her cottage. She supposed her deep desire for solitude went past not feeling worthy of being apart of a community or family. Before the world fell to pieces, she deeply desired to get away from the strife that was never ending in her life. Gather up Sophia, and little they had to their name and just disappear. It never happened, but it was a fantasy that enticed her every time Ed was not around.

Now that she was thinking about it fully, she realized she never really had anywhere to truly call _home_. Never felt that she truly belonged. Always been the odd-ball, being that she missed out on so much in her previous life. It was sad to say, but she experienced more on the open road.

Carol snorted, shelving her inner monologue for later. She was out in the open and it was getting dark quickly and despite her earlier bravado, she was not invincible.

\----

_Two days later…_

There’s a fierce determination burning just beneath Carol’s skin. After talking with Daryl, she was left unsatisfied by his reluctant answers about the Saviors and their people. She knew when he wasn’t telling the whole truth. But she let it be and enjoyed their brief reunion.

The next morning, after a restless night, she packed a light bag, gathered her weapons and set off for the kingdom. Each step only served to fuel her growing fury. She hated being lied to, much like she hated the thought of being used and abused by people who were the scum of the earth.

So, to say, when she neared the walls of the Kingdom, she was completely fired up and had not the patience for bullshit. She was vaguely aware of the splattered walker blood against her skin and the guards who opened the gates. Only Benjamin when he approached did she stop.

“Hey! We were just about to come out to clear the –”

“Where’s Morgan?” Carol demanded coldly.

The teenager stopped short. “You okay?”

“Where is Morgan?”

Benjamin caught on to her tone, clearly seeing that she was not in the mood. He gave her directions to Morgan’s room, which she learned was not far from her own room where she once stayed. By the time she arrived, her tempered as lessened considerably, enough that she could hold a civil conversation. One that ended with her being reduced to tears.  Morgan and his persistent, selfless offer to accompany her to Alexandria, had knocked the wind from her sails.

Outside in the living quarters, she swiped at her eyes, trying to compose herself, not wanting to draw any more attention to herself than she already had. The last thing she wanted was to run into Ezekiel in her current state.

Benjamin was determined to keep up with her brisk pace. “Is there anything I can help you with?”

“No.”

“Well, can I just-” Benjamin stammered. “If you don’t mind, could I walk back to the cottage with you?

“No!”  Carol snapped.

The teenager tried a different angle. “We have a drop today, but I can miss it.”

Carol turned on her heel to look at the boy and frowned.

“I just…I’m trying to learn, and seeing what you did here, I...” Benjamin trailed off. “There were five of them. I would just really appreciate it if you would just…let me see how you do what you do.”

Carol searched the boy’s face all the while he spoke. She was quick in her answer, not wanting to play teacher. “No. Go do your drop.” She didn’t wait for a response, not wanting to prolong her visit to the kingdom. She needed to be outside the walls with her current state of mind.

\---

_On the other side of the kingdom…_

Ezekiel gazed upon the kingdom from the upper level of his living quarters. His people were busy with their daily dues, unknowing to their leader’s watchful eye.

In the garden, one of his faithful soldiers carefully plucked rip melons from the spiraling vines. He pursed his lip at the sight, knowing the produce wasn’t meant for the man’s family or even someone else in the Kingdom.

Ezekiel was not surprised by the opening of the door, knowing it was no one other than Nabila. She was one of the few beside Jerry that had permission to visit him in his living quarters.

“You may approach Nabila.”

“I’m fine where I am.” Nabila kept a careful eye to Shiva.

 “Shiva likes you,” Ezekiel insisted.

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Nabila remained in her spot.

Ezekiel approached the younger woman instead. Seeing that she wasn’t going to budge despite his reassurance. “Tell me what you found.”

“You’re not going to like it.”

“I like waiting to hear bad news less.” Ezekiel retorted firmly.

Nabila explained the issue of the growing pest of the plants in the royal garden. She didn’t sugarcoat the truth, knowing that he was not a fan of it. In the grand scheme of things, he had put his own personal desires aside in favor of keeping his people fed.

Before parting the younger woman said. “Here’s the beautiful thing, Your Majesty. You can tear it out and cut it down. You can burn it and throw it all away. But if you want, it can all grow back.”

Ezekiel lips curved at the wisdom of Nabila’s words. It sounded much like something he would say. She quickly left, leaving him to watch as the soldier in the garden pushed the wheelbarrow full of melons. He pondered her words, feeling the weight of them pierce him deep.

Today they were to trade with the blasted Saviors. There was this constant unease churning in his gut. A sense of dread that left him restless during the night and anxious well into the morning. He hadn’t gone for a walk with Shiva, instead choosing to stay inside until it was time to go. He couldn’t shake that something bad was going to take place.

The large cat seemed to sense his distress, growling every so often. As if to say, _‘what’s the matter?’_

Ezekiel sighed heavily. He couldn’t hide forever, knowing his men were gearing up to leave. He beckoned for Shiva to follow him, leading her to inside to her cage. He secured his beloved pet for the time being. Promising to be back later.

Out of practiced habit, he further armed himself, against both the living and the dead and preceded downstairs. From there, he numbed his emotions, ready get on with the dreaded trip. The churning in his gut worsened as they left the kingdom walls.

After the first stop and clearing of the grocery cart blockade, time seemed to slow on the quiet road. He allowed himself the luxury of thinking of Carol as they drove. He hadn’t gone to check on her recently, instead chose others to go in his place. In a way, he was giving her space, not wanting to further crowd her.

Ezekiel knew Carol wasn’t his responsibility, but he still felt compelled to watch out for her. She was by no means weak, given she survived this long with out his help. But each time, he looked into her clear eyes he saw pain. Deep pain that was beyond the physical wounds she sustained before coming to the kingdom.

The little smiles she did give him never truly reached her eyes. Eyes, that had the power to pin him where he stood and take his breath away at the same time. She chipped at his defenses each time he was in her presence.

Perhaps that was his real reason for staying away. In her presence he could forget that the dead swarmed around them like mosquitoes. Could forget that a group of human vultures took from them at every chance.  It was a dangerous train of thought. It was more dangerous than keeping a tiger for a pet.

Ezekiel cleared the lump in his throat. He couldn’t afford to be distracted. Not now, when his men needed him to be strong and fearless in the face of the enemy.

The truck slowed to a stop, at the trade spot. The blasted Saviors were already there waiting to receive. Ezekiel left out a shaky breath, feeling his pulse racing. Something just didn’t feel right.

The exchange was tense, leaving Ezekiel feel like he was running out of air to breathe. He was seeing red, and literally wanted to throw his caution to the wind. It was not the time to be reckless. He wanted to put a bullet between Gavin’s eyes. He was unashamed to say he would find satisfaction in it.

Reluctantly, Ezekiel allowed their guns to be taken. No matter what he personally wanted, he had to think of the lives of the fighters around him.

To add insult to injury, on top of having their guns taken, they were some how short one damn melon. He was sure there was twelve in the crate when they left the Kingdom. He swore inwardly, keeping his stance of surrender while promising twice the amount of produce.

The tension in the air was thick enough to slice with a knife. His men glared at one another angrily as Gavin gave his rebuke. They didn’t hold up their end of the bargain, so they had to be dealt with. It was plain as day.

Someone had to die.

Ezekiel watched as the slender weasel of man pointed his gun in Richard’s face. Watched the fear cross each of his people’s faces, as they realized what was about to take place. Richard straightened his back, seeming to accept his impending fate.

The weasel instead aimed lower to fire his shot. Right into Benjamin’s leg. The boy dropped to the ground with Morgan rushing to his side.

Gavin appeared to be surprised but not enough, to keep from wasting more time in delivering his last threat before letting them go.

Everyone sprung into action. They loaded Benjamin on to the truck, making a speedy exit to drive to Carol’s cottage. He knew that she had the necessary supplies, since he ordered that she be supplied with enough to not only to treat her healing wounds but for future emergencies.

Ezekiel watched as the boy he considered a son fight to stay conscious. He was panting, and crying now, unashamed to show that he was immense pain. In vain, they tried to stop the bleeding as they made the journey to the cottage.

The truck skid to a stop outside the gates. Carol was already running up to them, ready to assist. She wasted no time in asking what happened but instead rushed to help Benjamin.

“Stay with me.” Ezekiel pleaded, holding on to Benjamin. He watched in horror as the boy’s blood gushed through the gauze, saturating it and coating Carol’s fingers. He struggled to focus on their faces, uttering his final words.

“T-to injure an opponent…is to injure yourself.” Benjamin managed between labored breaths.

It was nonsensical to Ezekiel’s ears but seem to pierce Morgan deeply. So much that he backed away from the table.

It wasn’t long afterward that Benjamin took his last breath.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Ezekiel couldn’t breathe. Each breath took considerable effort and hurt like hell as he gazed at Benjamin’s sheet covered body. Anguish racked through his body, squeezed at his throat. There was so much blood. It still dripped on the floor as they all stood in Carol’s living room.

No one dare utter a word. There was just the sickening ‘ _drip’ ‘drip’_ and the occasional shaky breath.

Ezekiel stiffly turned to gaze at Carol who stood solemnly.

“I’m sorry for coming to you,” he apologized. “We had no choice.”

The words came from his mouth, but he didn’t recognize his own voice. All he could recognize was the painful scream of his adopted son and a gunshot replaying in his head. Like a tape stuck on rewind.

Ezekiel vaguely registered that Morgan left. All he could do was stand still and stare at the aged wall. It wasn’t until one his men touched his shoulder, beckoning for them to leave and take Benjamin’s body back to the kingdom. Everything happened in slow motion and by night fall, he was left numb, and nearly on autopilot

The next morning, he watched in resentment as the gardeners prepared to burn the plants of the royal garden. He loaded the single melon that was the partial cause of Benjamin’s death, and climbed into the truck. The entire ride he cursed the blasted treaty with the Saviors. Thoughts of revenge echoed in his mind and hummed in his veins.  There were no words of wisdom that came to his mind. No words that he could offer his men who were grieving over their fallen comrade.

Then as if the day couldn’t get any worse, he witnessed Morgan strangle one of his most faithful soldiers to death. It was a relay of the previous day just with a different person.

Morgan climbed off Richard and stood to his full height, with scratches on his face from the struggle. Slowly, he explained his reasoning for murdering the man.  
  
“He-He did this?” Ezekiel stuttered. The truth pierced deep to his bones and made him wish that Morgan hadn’t killed Richard. He wanted that honor for himself. To learn that Benjamin had to die in a twisted plan made his blood boil. It pushed him further over the edge.

It was too much.  
\---

Sometime after Morgan’s startling visit, Carol found the strength to truly pack her belongs. It was time to stand and stop running. She gathered her weapons, arming herself for the short journey back to the Kingdom. It was different from her earlier visit. This time, she felt a different kind of fire in her blood. An awakening of sorts.

Inside the Kingdom walls, she could smell and see smoke, and for a moment her stomach dropped until she approached the entrance of the royal garden. The source of smoke was coming from multiple barrels. She was surprised to find the garden was now just plots of dirt.

At one of the garden beds, Ezekiel and Henry worked on a new transplant in the place of turned soil. Even from where she stood, she could see the weight of everything that happened resting on Ezekiel’s shoulders. She approached, not hesitant unlike before.  
  
Ezekiel’s voice was flat when he said her name. It was expected but still strange.

“I’m sorry.” Carol whispered.  
  
Ezekiel’s sad eyes searched her face. “I thank you.”  
  
Caroled struggled with her words, not wanting to further upset the grieving man. She was surprised that her voice was firm as it was. "I’m gonna be here now. We have to get ready. We have to fight.

“We do.” Ezekiel agreed. “But not today.” He silently invited her to follow him to the next garden bed where Henry worked. Carol dropped her bag and joined them in their task. Feeling the dirt between her fingers, was oddly comforting. It kept her mind off the raging thoughts that echoed in her mind. Despite not moving at a hurried pace, all the transplants from wheelbarrow were planted into the ground. The sun had begun to set, signaling for Henry to return inside to clean up and get ready for dinner.

Carol stayed behind, gazing at the kneeling man before her. It was a sight to behold, now that she could freely look at him. The last rays of sun-bathed Ezekiel’s skin, while a light dusting of dirt covering his forearms.

Ezekiel rouse to his full height, patted away the excess dirt and offered his hand. “Thank you Carol.”

Carol accepted his hand, standing easily to her feet. Somehow, she knew he wasn’t only thanking her for help in the garden. But instead of questioning it she replied. “You’re Welcome. Your Majesty.”

\----

_Later that evening…_  
  
Carol hadn't meant to intrude on Ezekiel's storytelling to Henry. She couldn't bring herself to leave now that she was present. Ezekiel's deep voice had dropped to a bit of an whisper, as he recited what she realized was a poem.   
  
_"A light went out of my life..._  
  
Shadows were everywhere.  
  
Daylight eventually came  
  
The brightness was never the same.  
  
Sleep on my loved one  
  
Peace is yours.”  
  
Carol hadn’t known Benjamin personally. Every interaction between them, she cold was toward him. She was so consumed with own her imposed exiled that she forgot that at the end of the day, he was just a boy that hadn’t quite reached manhood. Trying to prove himself and to the world that he was capable and that he was ready.  
  
_“Your life’s work is done._  
  
All who knew you can only say  
  
Well Done.  
  
Some stars shine so brightly  
  
They are never dull  
  
Their light shines on all our lives  
  
Just as yours had done..”  
  
Ezekiel finished the poem with a shaky breath. Henry had drifted asleep, still hiccupping from crying so much. He left dimmed the lamp, and joined Carol in the hallway.  
  
“He doesn’t like traditional bed time stories,” Ezekiel shut the door behind him.   
  
Carol only nodded. She felt out of place now that she was no longer just standing and listening. It was the first time they were truly alone since she came back that day. She hadn't wanted to treat Ezekiel like he was broken glass but was mindful that he was under a lot of pressure. Losing Benjamin, the weight of staying strong for the people and preparing for the impending war to come.   
  
"Are you comfortable in your room?" Ezekiel asked suddenly. "Is there anything that you need?"  
  
Carol shook her head. Even now he was worrying about someone other than himself. "No, I'm alright."   
  
Ezekiel cleared his throat. "I know it's late...but," he trailed off. "I don't want to be alone right now."  
  
The man standing her before was no longer the kingdom leader but a man full of grief. His jaw was set, and there were unshed tears in his eyes. Waiting to fall.   
  
"Yes,'" Carol replied.   
  
Ezekiel smiled weakly. He turned and headed down the corridor to what she assumed was his own private quarters. She followed, mindful to pay attention so when the time came, she would know how to get back to her own room.   
  
By the time Ezekiel shut door behind them, she pulled him into a hug. She knew that it was forward and probably not what he expected. But she knew from experience, a shoulder to cry on was beneficial. She relaxed when she felt his arms wrap around her middle and pull her closer. She could feel the slight tremble of his body against hers.   
  
"Let it out. I've got you," Carol smoothed a hand under his dreads to touch his neck. And that's when she felt the first of many tears hot against her skin. The shaking of his shoulders prompted her to tighten her hold on around him. They remained like that for some time, just holding one another.   
  
Carol drew gentle circles with her thumb against Ezekiel's neck, almost in tune with their breathing. She did it was an afterthought, not really paying attention to the reaction it garnered. She wondered when was the last time someone held him like this? Not taking comfort but giving it.  
  
"I shouldn't have pushed Benjamin..." Ezekiel mumbled against her neck. "Should have accepted that he wasn't ready. Yet I still allowed him to go with us to trade with those damn Saviors."  
  
Carol knew these were the thoughts that plagued his mind. It was easier to place the blame on oneself, and never accept that the situation was out of your control.   
  
"And Richard..." Ezekiel added. "How could I have been so stupid to ignore the man's spiraling behavior? The signs were there but I chose to ignore them."  
  
"You did what you thought was best," Carol answered. "You couldn't have known the day would turn out the way it did."  
  
"The whole reason the truce was in place was to protect the people. Instead it brought war to our doorstep."   
  
Carol shook her head. "No, war was on your doorstep the moment you first encountered the Saviors."  
  
"Still, my misstep in judgment cost both Benjamin and his father's life." Ezekiel insisted.   
  
Carol gently placed her hands on either side of his face. Her thumbs swiped at the remnant of tears. She whispered as if sharing a secret. "You have to live on. It hurts I know but you can't stop now. Henry and everyone else in the Kingdom need you at your strongest."  
  
Ezekiel swallowed hard. "You speak from experience."   


Thoughts of Sophia, and those who she had come care about and lost along the way flashed in her mind's eye. "I do. It is how I survived all this time."  
  
Ezekiel, closed his eyes, inhaled deeply, then exhaled and repeated. "I am glad you came back."  
  
Carol didn't miss the way Ezekiel’s arms tightened just a bit around her waist. "Me too."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for reading!   
> Poem used in this chapter was written by Elizabeth Postle


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